if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
