porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
Randomize
