so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
where are you?
Hypothermia
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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