Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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