She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Randomize
