is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
he was CRYING into my vagina
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
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