we're blogging at a bar
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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