Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
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