about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
