I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
Randomize