Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize
