Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
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I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
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His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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