i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
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