I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
I had to cum in my sink.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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