Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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