a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Randomize
