He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
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