every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Randomize
