Moan for me like Helen Keller
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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