dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
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