she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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