i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
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