hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Randomize