I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
They have beer where we have blood.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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