I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
I have tasted many bathrooms
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
