Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
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