My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
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