Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Randomize
