I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
you never un-have a 4some
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Randomize
