Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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