Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
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