may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
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