have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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