I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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