I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Randomize
