Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
