do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Still dying that you shit outside
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize
