your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Randomize
