Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Randomize
