I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
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