he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
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this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
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We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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