I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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