dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
Everclear isn't food dammit
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
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