your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
Randomize
