Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
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