a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
vagina is talking i cant
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Randomize