How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
