her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
I'm just crazy horny about you
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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