I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
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