i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
