dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
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